Jennifer Lopez Reflects: “It Took 30 Years” to Realize She Doesn’t Need to Grow Old with Someone to Feel Whole

At 55, Jennifer Lopez is embracing a profound shift in perspective about love, independence, and self-worth. The global superstar recently revealed that it took her three decades to understand a truth many spend a lifetime chasing—that she doesn’t need to grow old with a partner to feel “whole.”

A Storied Romantic History

Lopez’s love life has long been under the public microscope, with relationships and marriages that have captured headlines worldwide. From her early marriage to Ojani Noa (1997–1998) to her union with dancer Cris Judd (2001–2003), followed by a decade-long marriage to singer Marc Anthony (2004–2014), with whom she shares twins Max and Emme, her personal life has often been front-page news. Most recently, she married actor Ben Affleck in 2022, only to file for divorce two years later in August 2024.

The Turning Point: Divorce and Self-Discovery

Her divorce from Affleck marked more than just the end of a marriage—it sparked an era of reflection and growth. In a September 2024 interview with comedian Nikki Glaser for Interview magazine, Lopez candidly addressed the romantic ideal she once held. “For people who are romantics and love being in relationships and want to grow old with somebody, we think, ‘I have to have that to be whole and happy.’ And you don’t,” she said. “It only took 30 years,” she added with a laugh, underscoring the long journey toward self-realization.

Lopez described the early days of singlehood as “lonely, unfamiliar, scary, sad, and desperate,” but emphasized that confronting those emotions helped her discover, “Actually, I am capable of joy and happiness all by myself.”

Personal Growth Through Introspection

In a May 2025 interview with EL PAÍS, Lopez shared how she has leaned on therapy and literature to understand her relationship patterns and beliefs. Reading about childhood, marriage, love styles, and neuroscience, combined with individual, couples, and family therapy, has fostered a deeper self-awareness and empowerment.

Lopez also reflected on her role as a mother to 17-year-old twins Max and Emme, who are preparing to head to college. She expressed pride in guiding them through life’s challenges and vowed to emerge stronger, saying, “I think it’s all about learning about yourself. It’s all about knowing yourself.”

Balancing Career and Advocacy

Despite personal upheavals, Lopez’s professional momentum remains strong. She’s preparing for her first solo tour in six years in 2025 and continues to champion Latino representation through her Nuyorican production company. Lopez has been vocal about breaking stereotypes and pushing for diverse, empowering roles in Hollywood.

Public Reaction and Broader Cultural Impact

Fans and commentators alike have embraced Lopez’s message, with discussions on platforms like Reddit’s r/popculturechat and r/Fauxmoi highlighting the significance of her journey. Many applaud her candidness in dismantling romantic myths, especially after enduring public relationship challenges.

Aging with Grace and Confidence

Lopez’s reflections also touch on age and societal expectations. In a December 2024 Variety interview, she responded to comments about “getting up there” in years with resilience and positivity, describing this chapter as “the best time of my life.” She looks forward to sharing this vitality with fans on stage and beyond.

Conclusion

Jennifer Lopez’s revelation—that feeling whole is not contingent on growing old with someone—resonates as a powerful narrative of independence, self-love, and growth. Her journey from romantic ideals to personal empowerment serves as an inspiring reminder that fulfillment comes first from within. As she continues to evolve personally and professionally, Lopez exemplifies the strength and grace that come with embracing one’s true self.