The Heartbreaking Reason Marilyn Monroe Couldn’t Watch Some Like It Hot Again

For the world, Marilyn Monroe was the ultimate screen goddess — dazzling, funny, and seemingly untouchable. But for Norma Jeane, the woman behind the myth, fame was often a fragile mask. And nowhere did that divide feel more painful than in the one film she swore she would never watch again: the 1959 classic Some Like It Hot.

The beloved comedy cemented Monroe as the unforgettable Sugar Kane Kowalczyk — a role that perfectly balanced her vulnerability and charm. Yet behind closed doors, Monroe revealed that the experience of seeing herself in the film wasn’t joyful. It was devastating.

“I didn’t see her — I saw me pretending to be brave,” she reportedly confessed after a private screening, before quietly walking out of the room in tears.

A Private Screening That Turned Painful

What was meant to be a celebration — the film had earned critical acclaim and audiences adored her — instead became an emotional breaking point. According to friends who were present, Monroe’s mood shifted as the movie played.

“About halfway through, she stopped smiling,” one close friend recalled. “By the end, she was silent — and when the lights came up, she was crying.”

When asked what was wrong, Monroe’s only words were:

“She’s so lonely.”

Those who knew her understood exactly. While the world saw Sugar Kane — sparkling, sweet, full of hope — Marilyn saw herself: a woman trying to hold it all together under the weight of expectation.

The Pain Behind the Performance

By the time Some Like It Hot was filmed, Monroe’s life was far from carefree. She was battling anxiety, insomnia, and deep self-doubt about her talent. Director Billy Wilder famously clashed with her during production, frustrated by her frequent lateness and need for retakes. Yet even he admitted her fragility was inseparable from her brilliance.

“She’d drive you crazy,” Wilder once said. “Then she’d do something so honest, so perfect, you’d forget every delay. She was pure magic — but it came from pain.”

That pain was what made the performance so real — and so hard for Monroe herself to face.

“Everyone saw joy,” she later told a friend. “I saw fear. I saw a woman trying to smile through it all.”

A Role Too Close to Home

Monroe wasn’t disappointed in her work; in fact, she considered Sugar Kane one of her most truthful performances. But watching it felt like looking into a mirror she didn’t want to face.

“The camera captured everything I tried to hide,” she reportedly said. “That’s what good acting does — but sometimes it shows you too much.”

After that screening, Monroe refused to watch the film again. When asked why, she simply said:

“I don’t need to. I lived it.”

The Legacy of a Fragile Genius

Today, Some Like It Hot is hailed as one of the greatest comedies ever made — and Monroe’s turn as Sugar Kane remains iconic. But knowing her reaction adds a haunting depth to the laughter. The radiance audiences adored was, for her, an act of survival.

“People thought she was playing Sugar Kane,” one close friend later reflected. “But in that movie, Marilyn wasn’t acting. She was surviving.”

And perhaps that’s why her refusal to rewatch it feels so poignant. It wasn’t disappointment in the art. It was heartbreak at seeing, too clearly, the woman behind the smile.

“I didn’t see her,” Marilyn once said. “I saw me — pretending to be brave.”

More than six decades later, that quiet confession turns a beloved comedy into something deeper: a testament to the courage it takes to keep shining, even when the light feels unbearably heavy.